There’s that feeling that creeps up on you when you hear a song, visit a favorite restaurant, or watch a certain movie. I loved you once. The memories come creeping in and it’s not sad or happy. Just there. Lingering in the air. Sometimes I can’t find my way around them.

This time of year is bringing back so many mixed emotions for me. Last year around this time I was getting ready to move across the country to be with my ex. And with my birthday approaching in a few months it’s a reminder of the pain. But it’s also a reminder of how much I’ve grown. So much has happened in the last year and I’ve grown so much. It reminds me that either you can accept the things that happen to you and allow God to use it. Or you can let them hold you back. The choice is always up to you.

There’s power in your pain. The story – the testimony you tell speaks to people. Our struggles serve a purpose. My struggles may be insignificant to yours but we each have a story to tell. Each trial serves as an opportunity to inspire, enlighten, and give hope to others through their pain. Some mornings I wake up without a thought of my past. Others as of lately seem to weigh me down with the unmet promises and expectations of what could have been. I think in order to get over these things you have to let go of who you were and where you thought you would be. Sometimes the simplest fix is just leaving the past in the past and allowing yourself to become the person you’re meant to be.

The past year I’ve spent so much time being broken. I allowed someone else’s rejection define me and my current season. Then I had the realization that I’m responsible for what happens next. You need to ask yourself “Do I want to live in the what could have been?” It’s okay to hang up the memories and let go of the feelings. I had to surrender my heart and my hurt to God multiple times. Finally I feel that healing I’ve longed for. It’s all a process. And now I can say “I loved you once” and it’s okay.

Trust in God because He knows what He’s doing. Even though the unknown is scary God has everything mapped out before you. The trials, the tears, and the heartbreak all serve a purpose that is blessing you and causing you to shine for His glory.

Remember You are Fearfully Made

xoxo Taylor Nicole